THE COCKROACH

Last night I had a near death experience. I’ve heard that part of dealing with trauma is retelling so here goes:

At around 23:00 I decided I’d be good and go to sleep so that I could wake up early the next day and study some more (exam’s are just super fun right?). anyways, I get in to bed and spend the next half hour trying to adjust the fan beside my night table so the that the slightly cooler air will hit my face . (The A.C in my room is broken and I haven’t gotten round to fixing it. did I mention that it’s 33 C° out? yup. fun).

So finally around 24:30 I realize I ain’t going to sleep anytime soon and I might as well curl up on the couch in the living room (that has A.C!) and watch a good movie. I had just decided on When Harry Met Sally (I’m a sucker for the classics) when I casually look sideways. AND A COCKROACH SCURRIES ACROSS THE FLOOR.

I learned here that I am the “freeze” type in the “flight or fright” theory which was a good thing because my roommate was asleep in the next room and she would be totally pissed if she woke up because of cockroach. She would also not hesitate to casually throw a shoe on it, thus saving my life, and the go back to sleep. But being the good friend I am I decided to risk the danger rather then wake her.

So a few hours (seconds) later I unfroze and moved in to the “terrified squealing” faze. I followed the roach with my eyes so I knew where it was at all times and calculated my options.

  1. as of right now I am technically safe on the couch. I don’t think it can jump up here so option one is to just calmly (yeah right) watch my movie and enjoy the cool air, then deal with the transfer to my room when the time comes.
  2. sprint for my room and shut the door while I can still keep track of the thing.
  3. don’t cockroaches have wings? what if it decides to fly up here?

Thought number three had me almost hyperventilating and so I decided to go for option two. I slowly gathered up my things my gaze fixed on the roach and all the while being very careful not to make any sudden moves. Once I had everything in my hands I reached to shut the A.C off (goodbye breathable air) and dashed for my room with a silent shriek.

Once safely in my room with the door shut behind me (I made sure the crack under the door was small enough) I settled back in to my bed letting my room know I would not mention it’s heat for gratitude of the safety it had granted me. I had just finished this thought when I realized I hadn’t double checked the lock on the front door.

Now, contrary to what you may believe considering everything you read until now I am not a complete paranoid basket case. But my roommate has the bad habit of not locking the door behind her at night and we don’t live in the safest neighborhood.

I briefly calculated the higher risks- venturing back out to the unknown living room (remember I don’t know where the cockroach is anymore. most likely standing guard over my bedroom door ready to ambush me when I come out). Or sleeping with the front door unlocked. I eventually decided I was brave enough and willing enough to risk my own safety for that of my roommate’s and flat screen. Opening the door just a crack I made sure the coast was clear and made my second sprint of the night to the front door, checked the lock (of course it was locked) and back to my room with the agility and speed of an Olympic relay race runner.

running kid.jpg
OK so this is probably closer to what i actually looked like..

see moments like these are why I need a boyfriend.

 

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